Book of the Day
(( Each weekend I try to post at least one book from my Norrathian Museum for others to read. So far the collection includes 150 player written books, and you can find it on the Antonia Bayle server under the name of Ellithia, in the North Freeport mage tower.))
Zorgin’s Guide to Being a Nuisance Volume 1 – by Zorgin
This is a comprehensive list of brief tips to being an absolute pain in everyone’s ass.
#1~ Teach your friend’s children to curse.
#2~ if you know someone who wears full plate, get a high-powered magnet. Let hilarity ensue.
#3~ Paint “Ridin’ Dirty” on the side of their mount.
#4~ Say a friend’s name sensually over and over again through Guild Communications.
#5~ Shout, “Party at ~Soandso’s~ house!” Insist the party take place. Do not clean up afterwards.
#6~ Fill their home with random pets. Make sure they all have eaten beans beforehand.
#7~ Eat all their food. Insist they were sleepwalking and did it themselves.
#8~ Talk like a Ratonga for no reason. If you are a Ratonga, resist your lisp and speak like a scholar for a day. When questioned, revert back immediately and barrage them with insults.
#9~ Spend the day walking on your hands. When questioned, slap them.
#10~ Fill your friend’s adventuring flask with Laxatives.
#11~ Line your friend’s armor with itching powder. Insist pixies are responsible.
#12~ Matter of fact, insist pixies are responsible for -everything-.
#13~ end every sentence with the word “Penguin”.
#14~ Insist you teach everyone the Harpy language, Screechsong.
#15~ Shove people off of Kelethin.
#16~ Shove people into the pits of Neriak.
#17~ Shove people into the Executioner’s Pit in Freeport.
#18~ Shove people into the Qeynos Moat.
#19~ Shove people off the top platform of Gorowyn. Help them back up by telling them to use every wrong lift.
#20~ Try to speak Tik-Tok.
#21~ Go to a public gathering. When spoken to, shriek “SPIDERS” at the top of your lungs and punch the person speaking to you in the nose.
#22~ Pester your friend while out adventuring to come by your place afterwards for a drink. when you finally get there, announce you’re out of things to drink.
#23~ If you have a ranger friend, remove all the tips from his arrows. Scatter them around his bedroom floor that night, and in the morning, listen for the screams.
#24~ Go to a less-wealthy Guild’s guildhall. Ask them for obscure amenities, and when they tell you they don’t have them, act all haughty and say, “well, OUR guild hall has it…”
#25~ Go to another guild’s hall, shriek at the top of your lungs, then take a portal anywhere. Repeat every day at the same time.