I’ve started playing a little ESO, having never gotten beyond level 3 before, and having neglected my account for the better part of.. well, all the years the game has been active. Below is my Nord Dragonknight’s tale of a latest adventure.. 

“Quickly!” the apothecary screamed at me. “Use the salve you just collected for me, and apply it to the injured. We need them cured.”

I admit, I panicked. I looked at the men in the burnt down house, ran up to the closest one, and .. well. Decapitated him in one swoop of my 2 handed axe. It was like swinging through butter.

The apothecary just stared at me, mouth wide.

“What… Why.. wh… You know the guards will be after you for this now!” He screeched at me, pointing to the fellows head that was still in my hands. “You’ll have a bounty on you, and you won’t be able to enter the cities without recognition.”

I stood there not quite comprehending how things went down.

“I wanted you to heal the men OUTSIDE. OUTSIDE!” The apothecary continued to yell at me and point, obviously we were both having a bad day, but I couldn’t tell at this point which was worse. Probably the guy whose head I had in my hands. I dropped the head on the floor, kicked the body over to the side so no one would trip on it, and ran out the door with my bundle of salves, looking frantically for whoever the apothecary meant for me to heal. It didn’t take long for my eyes to adjust to the ash covered scenery and spot prone bodies laying all over the place. Realization dawned on me.

THESE were the guys I was meant to heal, not the ones inside the burned down house that were probably perfectly healthy before I .. well. Solved that.

I sighed. It was going to be a long day.