I’m trying to eat better, and one of my major issues (besides snacking when I’m stressed) is portion control. A lot of times I’m just so busy and stressed during the day that I’ll binge eat whatever is laying around as I come across it. I don’t often feel like cooking, and because I have two littles, one who has very strict dietary requirements it means that I don’t eat very well.

In an attempt at making some time to take care of myself, I went and planned out 5 breakfast/lunch/dinner that I could make all at once and just have for the week. I don’t mind eating the same things for multiple days so long as I enjoy what I’m eating. I made egg & ham breakfast wraps for breakfast, I made a veggie soup & buns for lunch, and dinner is rice & chicken with bell peppers & pickled onion. Snacks? I got carrots and tzatziki. So far (3 days in, I know that’s not much) I’m moving more and I’m eating my prepared meals without snacking outside of it. There are some growing pains, but it’s a work in progress.

Next? I need to work on stress levels, and sleep. Maybe not trying to do ALL the things every single day. That one will take some time. But, for now, this is a start.

I started streaming after a 3 year hiatus back in June, playing World of Warcraft and doing gold making. The problem is I have incredible anxiety and it’s easy to talk myself out of streaming when at the end of the day I’m exhausted and I just have nothing left to give an audience.

I want to stream. I enjoy it. I think it could help with my anxiety issues – but taking the plunge and sticking with a schedule is something that I just have such a difficult time with. I recently set up an AirPlay server on my PC so that I can stream my Procreate art to OBS and perhaps do some art streams in the future too. I keep meaning to get some sort of system set up to stream my spinning, or my sock knitting machine, but end up doubting myself and just end up doing nothing instead. It’s frustrating. I’m frustrated.

I had written out this enormous post about navigating depression and anxiety but deleted it because what is the point. People don’t like to hear about that stuff, and I don’t like to promote it. Blah blah blah words and stuff the end.

August is quickly approaching, and for a number of years now I’ve participated in Blaugust in various degrees, and hopefully this year will be more of the same. I know my blog posts tend to come in waves, but Blaugust has always been a great motivator. Belghast has all of the details over on his blog, and don’t forget to join the discord too if you’re into that sort of thing. You absolutely don’t have to if it’s not your thing. I’ve always loved watching the community that has evolved from this event, but I also tend to feel a bit on the outskirts of things. A part, but not a part.

The idea is to try to post on your blog as much as you feel comfortable doing. Some folks use it as motivation to post all 31 days, others have a more relaxed approach. There are little mini goals this year, along with the regular schedule for some post motivation. If it’s something you’ve never looked into before and you’re curious about it, I highly suggest checking things out. Blogging might be ‘dead’ but there are those of us who continue to carry the torch.

Happy writing!

One thing I’ve wanted for quite some time is a fitness tracker. I’ve had a number of fitbit products over the years, but they never lasted longer than a year, whether it was because of poor quality or maybe my lifestyle was just too rough, I’m not sure. I decided enough was enough. I knew I was going to either go with an apple watch (let’s face it, I’m already deeply vested in apple products, we have 3 iPads, an iPhone, and a MacBook Pro), or I was going to go with Garmin. In the end I decided it was more important for me to have a fitness watch with smart watch capabilities, than it was to have a smart watch with fitness capabilities. I went with the Garmin 245 – heavily discounted from $479 to $299 (probably because they’ve just released the 255, and want to get rid of stock).

Setting it up was daunting but simple. It’s highly customizable, everything from the watch face to the screens that show to what activities you track. It gives health and fitness statistics like a heart rate monitor and oxygen. It can determine your sleep stats (though people say Garmin does not do this well, I think that can be said for most devices, they’re just not really there yet). It has GPS, can let me know if I have a call or messages on my phone, and so far I’m quite pleased with the device over all. Whether or not it stands up to the test of time is another matter. For the price I paid, I’d like it to last at least three years with constant use. It’s also just plain strange to be wearing a watch again, I haven’t worn one for many years.

I’m hoping this motivates me to move more, and to get healthier. I love statistics and have had good experiences in the past – so we’ll just have to see. On a side note, it’s hilarious that this also tracks stress levels. Let me tell you, as a parent to a 3 and 5 year old, those stress levels are ping ponging all over the damn place and bedtime is a zone you can effectively see on the charts.

Just over a month since I’ve written here, and absolutely everything in life has changed once again (finally). After 2.5 years we moved from our frozen home in the far North of Canada to a more moderate location in Nova Scotia (East Coast). This came after 6+ months of fighting and advocating for our family, and it was pretty draining. No one should have to fight so hard for quality of life changes against a government entity, but here we are.

We’re still moving in, furniture arrived two days ago, and there are boxes in the majority of rooms. The kids rooms are done as well as the rec room (ie: computers, TV, and other ‘essentials’) and most of the kitchen is unpacked. That leaves the bathrooms, the master bedroom, and my yarn room to assemble. All of us are pretty sick, my husband and son have been sick for almost a month straight now. We tested for covid just before we left, so it might be some sort of long drawn out recovery from that. It sucks.

That being said, already some things are so much better. We have a lot more room. A LOT more privacy. We have two day shipping instead of 2 week. Mail comes to the box at the end of our lane instead of to a PO Box. The internet is 500mbps+ instead of 5. Upload is 15mbps+ instead of 0.05. Some things are still daunting, the town has a very involved and confusing garbage collection that is once every two weeks and you have to sort absolutely everything. We’re not quite sure how to human with others any more after so long apart. The husband also has a lot to get used to at his new post, and since it’s larger and more spread out everyone sort of does their own thing and it’s not as close as our previous post. Overall, the changes are great for our family, but it will take some time.

I was able to update and patch all of my games that have been neglected since we moved, and let me tell you, I had a lot. It was amazing to see how fast everything updated. I plan on picking up with streams around June 25th – I’ll be streaming world of warcraft gold making, I know not everyone is comfortable with that game these days, but I believe in the people who continue to work on it, and it’s one of my comfort games, so I hope to have a bit of fun. I’ll also be streaming some Black Desert Online in the future, and I do plan on trying to stream a lot of fiber related stuff. Spinning yarn, preparing yarn, knitting, we’ll see what else. All in all I hope to be able to get back to a few hobbies that I’m very passionate about, and have more time and less stress in the long run. For now, we’re taking it slow and making this house a home.

Happy gaming, no matter where you find yourself!

In the before times (eg: before I had kids) I used to really love art. Drawing, in specific. I took art all through high school and while I didn’t have any grand ideas of doing it professionally, it was certainly something I really thought I had a knack for (practice, practice, and more practice). Eventually as life progressed I got involved with someone who didn’t share that passion, didn’t encourage or motivate my skills, and while they never actively discouraged my artistic endevours, there simply wasn’t any place for it in my back-then life.

That was around 20 years ago, and my sketch books have gone unused for the better part of those 20 years.

The thing is, it’s part of who I am. I love drawing. I love art. I love landscapes and architecture in specific. I’m not really one for drawing characters or people (I suppose I’m a hermit even in my artwork) but I decided ‘why not’ even though so much time had passed. I’m almost 41, I have two kids, and a loving husband who encourages and motivates me in ways I had never dreamed of. A little over a year ago I started doing digital art as a means to compensate for my multiple sclerosis issues. My hands shake a lot some days, and I have a lot of pain. Digital art gives me some freedoms otherwise not allowed, and without needing so many ‘tools’ I was able to pick it up and put it down much easier.

Last year I completed a total of 50 pieces, almost one a week for the entire year (though that was not my schedule). This year I’d like to at least match that, and perhaps even surpass it. To date, I’ve done 14 pieces. Some large and involved, others just quick studies. I picked up some Udemy courses on digital painting, and I’ve been following along. I’m learning sometimes brushes matter – and sometimes they just don’t. Relying on my own artistic instinct has been incredible. I’m at the stage now where after just a few brush (pencil) strokes I can ‘phase’ into that artistic mindset where time passes and I’m completely unware.

My latest piece took almost 3 hours to complete, and it didn’t feel any longer than the ones that take me twenty. My hands of course know the difference and constantly remind me, but I’m hoping with time and (even more) practice that perhaps that will ease into a comfortable dull ache rather than the blindingly annoying pain I get now. I’m happy with my progress. I’m happy seeing my skills grow. Honestly? I’m just happy.

I do have a deviantART account that is quite ancient and filled with art from my entire lifetime (as it were) so if you’ve got one feel free to friend me there. I’m out of touch with where people are keeping their art these days, so I may shift my activity some place else over time but for now, that’s where I am. I have no goals at the moment to monetize this or to turn it into anything more than what it is – me finally doing something for myself, and working on a skill that gives me great joy. It just feels nice.